誰不希望自己兒女、學生未來一帆風順？但真的有為人父的不這麼認為。美國首席大法官羅伯茲（John Roberts）上個月 3 日受邀至兒子就讀的中學（知名男校 Cardigan Mountain School）發表畢業致詞，他的致詞裡面沒有「前程似錦、鵬程萬里」， 卻希望台下所有學生能遭遇「不幸」、「挫敗」甚至是「被背叛」。

他讀法條讀到「秀逗」了嗎？當然不是，仔細看完畢業致詞影片後，仍然有許多人深受感動，羅伯茲並沒有憑空為孩子勾勒出美好未來的藍圖，而是期待下一代能有跌倒之後重新爬起來奮鬥的勇氣。要講出這番話，充滿為人父的掙扎，卻也尊重孩子成為一個獨立的個體，洋溢著對孩子的期待。

不到 20 分鐘的致詞裡，羅伯茲提出了真摯的建議、幽默賣關子，以及獻給畢業生的罕見「祝福」。他希望孩子能遭遇不幸，如此才能了解到成功不是完全你所應得的，而他人的失敗也不是他們所應得的結果，從中體悟運動家精神的重要性。同時，他也叮囑學生尊重周遭社經地位較低的人，建議學生時刻面帶微笑、主動打招呼等等。

羅伯茲也建議，當社會上瀰漫著要人「做自己」的風氣時，要先搞清楚自己是怎樣的人，不要排斥改變自己，要無時無刻成為更好的人，才能夠安心活出真我。

最後，他以美國歌手巴布．狄倫（Bob Dylan）的名曲《永遠年輕》（Forever Young）歌詞獻給畢業生，這是巴布．狄倫寫給自己兒子的歌，雖然現在很多年輕人可能沒聽過，但羅伯茲認為非常適合描述父母對子女的期許。

這份不尋常的祝福詞被《華盛頓郵報》、《時代周刊》、《華爾街日報》等各大美國媒體報導，甚至全世界都在瘋傳。以下為致詞中英節錄：

通常畢業致詞者會祝你們好運還會祝你們心想事成，但我不會這麼做。我會告訴你們原因。

在接下來數年的三不五時間，我希望你們被不公平對待，如此你們才知道公平正義的重要。我希望你們遭遇背叛，如此才知道忠誠的重要性。

很抱歉要這麼說，但我希望你們有時感到孤單，這樣才不會把朋友當作理所當然。

我希望你們三不五時遭遇不幸，如此才能意識到機率和運氣在人生中扮演的角色，了解成功不是完全你所應得的，而他人的失敗也不是他們所應得的結果。

當你們失敗時，人生三不五時一定會有失敗，我希望你的對手會對你的失敗幸災樂禍，讓你們理解運動家精神的重要性。

我希望你們遭忽視，如此才會知道聆聽他人的重要性，我還希望你們遭遇足夠的痛苦來學習同理心。

不管是否來自我的希望，這些事終究會發生。 至於你們是否能從中獲利，則取決於你們從不幸中獲得訊息的能力。

畢業致詞者通常會給學生一些建議。他們會給一些廣泛的建議，也會給一些有用的小撇步。

最常給的建議就是：做自己。給所有穿著一樣的人如此建議實在有點怪，但你們確實應該做自己。

只是你們得了解做自己的意義何在。除非你很完美，否則做自己不代表不能接受改變。

在某些狀況來說，你不應該做自己，而是應該變成更好的人。大家說『做自己』是因為他們希望你們能阻擋外界要求你們做的事， 但除非你們了解自己是誰，或思考過自己是誰，否則無法『做自己』。

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Now the commencement speakers will typically also wish you good luck and extend good wishes to you. I will not do that, and I’ll tell you why.

From time to time in the years to come, I hope you will be treated unfairly, so that you will come to know the value of justice. I hope that you will suffer betrayal because that will teach you the importance of loyalty.

Sorry to say, but I hope you will be lonely from time to time so that you don’t take friends for granted.

I wish you bad luck, again, from time to time so that you will be conscious of the role of chance in life and understand that your success is not completely deserved and that the failure of others is not completely deserved either.

And when you lose, as you will from time to time, I hope every now and then, your opponent will gloat over your failure. It is a way for you to understand the importance of sportsmanship.

I hope you’ll be ignored so you know the importance of listening to others, and I hope you will have just enough pain to learn compassion. Whether I wish these things or not, they’re going to happen.

And whether you benefit from them or not will depend upon your ability to see the message in your misfortunes.

Now commencement speakers are also expected to give some advice. They give grand advice, and they give some useful tips.

The most common grand advice they give is for you to be yourself. It is an odd piece of advice to give people dressed identically, but you should — you should be yourself.

But you should understand what that means. Unless you are perfect, it does not mean don’t make any changes.

In a certain sense, you should not be yourself. You should try to become something better.

People say ‘be yourself’ because they want you to resist the impulse to conform to what others want you to be. But you can’t be yourself if you don’t learn who are, and you can’t learn who you are unless you think about it.

May God bless and keep you always
May your wishes all come true
May you always do for others
And let others do for you
May you build a ladder to the stars
And climb on every rung
May you stay
Forever young
May you grow up to be righteous
May you grow up to be true
May you always know the truth
And see the lights surrounding you
May you always be courageous
Stand upright and be strong
And may you stay
Forever young
May your hands always be busy
May your feet always be swift
May you have a strong foundation
When the winds of changes shift
May your heart always be joyful
May your song always be sung
And may you stay
Forever young

延伸閱讀

18 分鐘完整致詞在這裡！